The Lunch Diplomacy

 In the course of business, we tend to meet a lot of people. Some we like right away and others take time to grow on us and then there are those that are best not mentioned. However, as an executive, you are supposed to deal with all of them and achieve your business interests. More often than not, trust is built over a period of time gradually and perhaps many a time opportunities may not wait.

Over my 2 decades long career, I have realised that sharing a meal with a prospect often achieves what months of interaction don't. And there is a good enough reason for that!
As social animals, we have been conditioned to trust people we share food with. Right from our gathering and hunting days, the group would build a circle around the community fire and eat the day’s rewards and discuss the day’s achievements and perhaps make plans for the next day. The mutual trust was paramount in these gatherings and one could eat without the fear of being attacked.There may have been exceptions in History though, perhaps the most obvious one being a certain Mister Judas Iscariot,dressed up in Green and Blue and clutching his bag of Silver in the Last Supper.
Nevertheless this among other survival methods is deeply engrained in our psyches and hence a shared meal does wonders to bridge the trust deficit, if any, between the participants. I am a virtual evangelist for what I call “The Lunch Diplomacy”.
But why do I not recommend Breakfast meetings, or for that matter, Dinner meetings? My experience tells me that people are normally rushed up to reach their work places in the morning, after making sure that all is taken care of at homes and they just may not be in the right frame of mind for official meetings. Also, many of us tend to have really early breakfasts and some of us actually skip it, not that I endorse such a trait. So breakfast even though a great idea, does not usually work too well.

Regarding Dinner meetings, some of us like to consume liquor more than the others and often meetings are more fruitful in terms of discussing whether it is Germany or Belgium that makes the best beers in the world. I am with Belgium on this one though ;) Also, Dinner meetings can usually last for a few hours and this eats into the family time. Many Women executives may not be too keen on Dinner meetings for obvious reasons. So Dinner meetings usually may not be what the Doctor ordered.

During Lunch meetings, both the parties have about an hour to spare so it is a meeting clearly limited by the time in hand. This helps people to focus better. Normally alcohol is avoided as people have to go back to their respective offices, and nobody would like colleagues to sniff and guess: “Hoegaarden? Right? Or is it Stella??”

And when it is Dinner get togethers, I strongly urge avoiding Business discussions. I’m reminded of the time when a colleague promised extra discounts especially for the subsidiary that I was heading ;) Stella does get you to talk more!